Voodoo Dick

Voodoo Dick
Voodoo Dick There was this businessman who was getting ready to go on a long
business trip. He knew his wife was a flirtatious sort, so he thought he'd try
to get her something to keep her occupied while he was gone, because he didn't
much like the idea of her screwing someone else. So he went to a store that
sold sex toys and started looking around. He thought about a life-sized sex
doll, but that was too close to another man for him. He was browsing through
the dildos, looking for something special to please his wife, and started
talking to the old man behind the counter. He explained his situation. The old
man said, "Well, I don't really know of anything that will do the trick. We
have vibrating dildos, special attachments, and so on, but I don't know of
anything that will keep her occupied for weeks, except -- " and he
stopped. "Except what?" the man asked. "Nothing,nothing." "C'mon, tell me! I
need something!" "Well, sir, I don't usually mention this, but there is
the 'voodoodick.'" "So what's up with this voodoo dick?" he asked. The old man
reached under the counter, and pulled out an old wooden box, carved with
strange symbols. He opened it, and there lay a very ordinary-looking dildo. The
businessman laughed, and said "Big fucking deal. It looks like every other
dildo in this shop!" The old man replied, "But you haven't seen what it'll do
yet." He pointed to a door and said "Voodoo dick, the door." The voodoo dick
rose out of its box, darted over to the door, and started screwing the keyhole.
The whole door shook with the vibrations, and a crack developed down the
middle. Before the door could split, the old man said "Voodoo dick, get back in
your box!" The voodoo dick stopped, floated back to the box and lay there
quiescent once more. "I'll take it!" said the businessman. The old man
resisted, saying it wasn't for sale, but he finally surrendered to $700 in
cash.

The guy took it home to his wife, told her it was a special dildo and that to
use it, all she had to do was say "Voodoo dick, my pussy." He left for his trip
satisfied that things would be fine while he wasgone. After he'd been gone a
few days, the wife was unbearably horny. She thought of several people who
would willingly satisfy her, but then she remembered the voodoo dick. She got
it out, and said "Voodoo dick, my pussy!" The voodoo dick shot to her crotch
and started pumping. It was great, like nothing she'd ever experienced
before.After three orgasms, she decided she'd had enough, and tried to pull it
out, but it was stuck in her, still thrusting. She tried and tried to get it
out, but nothing worked. Her husband had forgot to tell her how toshut it off.
So she decided to go to the hospital to see if they could help.

She put her clothes on, got in the car and started to drive to the hospital,
quivering with every thrust of the dildo. On the way, another orgasm nearly
made her swerve off the road, and she was pulled over by a policeman. He asked
for her license, and then asked how much she'd had to drink. Gasping and
twitching, she explained that she hadn't been drinking, but that a voodoo dick
was stuck in her pussy, and wouldn't stop screwing. The officer looked at her
for a second, and then said "Yea, right... Voodoo dick, my ass!"


無敵按摩棒的故事--18+

一位富豪娶了一美嬌娘，但是生意上的關係，富豪需要出國一星期！

富豪擔心自己不在的這一星期，老婆會因無法滿足心理需求而去"討客兄"！

他靈機一動，想買一支"代替品"給老婆，以填補她的空虛，於是去了一家情趣用品店.......

在店裡逛了老半天，他所看到的都是一些很普通的按摩棒！

於是富豪就開口問老闆：你有沒有高級一點的按摩棒啊？價錢不是問題！

老闆點了點頭說：喔~有的，你請稍等一下！

說完就走到倉庫裡拿了個木盒出來！打開木盒是一支電動按摩棒！

富豪看了看說：這好像沒什麼特殊的嘛~！

老闆笑了笑後，對著木盒裡的這支按摩棒叫道：無敵按摩棒~筆筒！

話一說完，木盒裡的按摩棒飛了起來，朝向筆筒狂抽起來...........

老闆接著又說：無敵按摩棒~杯子！

按摩棒又飛過去向杯子猛插起來................

此時老闆說了一聲：無敵按摩棒~回木盒！

此話一出，按摩棒竟乖乖的飛回盒中！

富豪看了之後，心想：嘿嘿！有了這支，我不在的這一個星期，就沒什麼問題了！

於是將它買下，要踏出店門時，老闆交代說：記得不用時要叫它回木盒喔！

回到家中，富豪便操作一次給老婆看，並吩咐老婆不用時記得叫它回木盒！

老婆點了點頭，心裡高興非常！當天富豪便出國去了！

隔日..............

老婆閒時突感空虛，想起了那支按摩棒，於是打開了木盒，叫了一聲：無敵按摩棒~XX(消音了)！

此時按摩棒飛了出來，飛向那XX(消音了)狂抽猛送.................

就這樣持續許久，老婆滿足了，叫了一聲：無敵按摩棒~停！

按摩棒卻沒停，還是繼續..........

無敵按摩棒~夠了！無敵按摩棒~可以了！無論老婆怎麼試，按摩棒就是不停..........

老婆情急之下，趕快穿上衣服，跳上車要去找那家情趣用品店老闆求救！

一路上按摩棒還是繼續在XX(消音了)進進出出，老婆實在已經快受不了啦...........

於是油門用力踩下去，狂飆...............

結果就被臨檢的警察攔截下來，警察揮了揮手，老婆停了下來，立即下了車！

就開始跟警察說明原委.................

警察聽完之後，哈哈大笑的說：無敵按摩棒~咖稱啦！你騙誰啊~~~

此時按摩棒朝向這名警察的咖稱飛過去...............